My friend Mindy, a 42-year-old single mom, recently started dating Brad whom she met on a dating site.
They chatted for a bit, flirted online, and agreed to meet in person.
For all intents and purposes, it seemed like a done deal.
“I have a good feeling about this,” Mindy thought.
After all, Brad’s profile said that he was a firefighter and helped out at the Little League in his area.
Plus, his (already extremely flattering) photo featured Brad’s pet Labrador, which, in Mindy’s opinion, was the deal-clincher for her.
And right from the get-go, they seemed to hit it off well.
The food was great, the drinks were flowing, and the sparks were definitely flying.
Less than an hour into the date, Mindy knew the chemistry was undeniable. She was sure Brad was a good fit.
Then, the bill came.
Mindy was fully expecting Brad to say something like, “Don’t worry about it, I got it…”
But after nervously eyeing the check – and exchanging glances at each other – Mindy broke the awkward silence (which felt like forever) by asking, "Can I chip in?"
Looking relieved, Brad said, “Oh, if you’re ok that, then I can cover my half. Thanks!”
Although Mindy felt a slight twinge of annoyance, she ended up splitting the bill with him.
Who Supposed Pay The Bill, Anyway?
Since then, they’ve gone out a couple more times, but Mindy’s been on the fence about the whole thing.
This was when she came to me, asking for my take on the situation.
Mindy told me, “On our second date, he told me that he’d just had his car fixed, which was why he was relieved when I offered to split the bill.”
Mindy added, "And the good news was that he paid for everything straight away without waiting for me to chime in."
“BUT here’s the thing,” she said, with a hint of disappointment in her voice, “He kinda went back to his ‘old ways’ on our third date…”
“See, he *did* pick up the bill that time, BUT he had that SAME look on his face from our first date… you know, that ‘please help me out’ look…”
Mindy finished with a sigh, saying, “Everything would’ve been great if it wasn’t for this whole bill fiasco… I mean, is it even an issue to begin with?”
So this is what I told her:
“Personally, I think he should have gotten the bill on the first date since he was the one who asked you out. I mean, even if you did offer to split it, he should’ve insisted on paying – that's just how dating goes.”
“But the fact that he tried to make up for it by getting the bill AFTER that is a good sign.”
“And you did know he's not exactly a millionaire, to begin with, so maybe that was why he acted the way he did on your first and third dates."
"I know a lot of guys who are jumpy around the issue of money.
.. and many of them have this fear that women just see them for how much they make - and not much beyond that.”
Then I said, “If the way he acts with the bill is too much for you, then you’d best move on…”
“OR, you could also consider all of his wonderful qualities and give him another chance to see how it goes.”
“If he really turns out to be a chronic cheapskate, well, then at least you tried.”
How To Stop Money From Cramping Your (Dating) Style
Like Mindy, a lot of women don't have the leverage to decide how to proceed with a similar situation.
When they’re lacking financial independence, it can really throw a wrench in their dating lives…
…not to mention their relationships.
Let me put it this way: in an ideal world (i.e., one where money isn’t an issue)…
…a woman can bring out her purse when the bill comes, then wait for the guy to make the first move (as he should).
And if he offers to pay, she can thank him with a smile, and wrap things up.
BUT if he doesn’t offer to pay, she should be able to help out – and actually MEAN it.
And if he DOES take up her offer, she can pay her share with NO hard feelings.
Later on, she can figure out if the whole was just a miscommunication…
…or if his behavior displayed red flags of actual cheapness.
Either way, it’s wise to be in a good position no matter what the outcome is – and financial independence is the BEST way to do that.
And in case things DO get serious, being able to pay for your own stuff is a good foundation for the relationship - and creates a healthy dynamic between you two.
But what do I mean by that, exactly?
Well, here are three ways financial independence (FI) sets the right precedent in a relationship:
#1: FI Encourages a Sense of Autonomy (Hint: That’s a GOOD Thing!)
According to financial experts, it’s better for someone to be financially independent BEFORE getting into a relationship.
That’s because it makes for a smoother and less painful transition (financially speaking) for everyone involved. There’s noticeably less tension about expenses or with discussions about who pays which bill.
And if both people in the relationship gets to decide how to spend their money, that means fewer arguments.
#2: FI Sets The Stage for Mutual Respect
Like I said, a couple won’t be getting into fights about the stuff they buy for themselves.
If both of them are making enough so they can split the expenses equally (or at the very least, agree on a fair arrangement)…
…then they're free to buy whatever they want on their dime.
That means no petty squabbles about the boyfriend’s (or husband’s) taste for classic vinyl records, or the girlfriend’s (or wife’s) love of designer shoes.
As long as it doesn’t affect their savings - or way of life - then they’ll probably be ok with the other person’s spending habits.
#3: FI is Healthy In The Long Run
Generally speaking, couples who aren’t dependent on each other get to maintain their individual identities.
What I mean is that in a financially stable relationship, people can relate and behave towards each other on EQUAL terms.
So that means a couple can focus on being there for each other and growing together...
...without dealing with the unnecessary stress of money-related issues.
And being financially independent means you wouldn’t have to go through the same drama that Mindy did.
Like comedian Chris Rock says, “Wealth is not about having a lot of money - it's about having a lot of options.”
And FI gives you three options when you're on a date:
So either way, you're good.
Whether you want to keep dating a guy - or keep looking elsewhere…
…you know that your decision is coming from a place of independence - and NOT neediness.
Now, as much as I’d like to talk more about the how-to’s of financial independence, that’s a whole other topic…
But I will say that the world’s wealthiest folks have something in common.
It’s not being born with money, looks, or talent.
It’s about HABITS.
Thomas C. Corley, a prominent author and financial authority, spent five years of his life studying the habits of almost 200 self-made millionaires.
And he says that habits separate the rich from everybody else. According to him, the things that we do subconsciously make up 40 PERCENT of our waking hours.
That’s a HUGE amount of time spent on doing things - and making decisions - on AUTO-PILOT.
When you think about it, habits are nothing more than mental shortcuts which help us quickly make a bunch of decisions throughout the day.
That way, we don’t use up too much brain energy and willpower.
So, much of our financial independence (or lack thereof) is HEAVILY influenced by our subconscious decision-making skills.
And for anyone looking to improve their financial situation, all they need to do is optimize their subconscious money habits.
But you might be thinking, “Well, habits take a LONG time to develop.”
Well, I’m happy to say that that’s really not the case – not anymore, at least.
You see, there is a way to encode "rich people habits" directly to the subconscious – without having to spend months or years doing so.
And once you start acting, thinking, and behaving like a wealthy person…
…then it’s only a matter of time before the reality of your financial situation catches up with your habits.
To learn more about how to do this, CLICK HERE NOW [Link this to https://subliminaltracks.com/r/awmc/YourIDHere/YourTracking].
I’ll talk to you soon!
“I always knew I was going to be rich. I don't think I ever doubted it for a minute.”
― Warren Buffett
Chris Gardner never thought he’d end up spending the night in a public toilet with his young son, but that’s what happened to him.
Out of money and out of options, he was forced to live like this for a year in San Francisco during the early 1980s.
Barely in his thirties, Chris scraped and struggled to keep himself and his son afloat.
During the day, he made next to nothing as a trainee at a stock brokerage. At night, Chris had to find the next place they could sleep at.
But despite these overwhelming odds, he managed not only to survive, but also go on to establish his own firm.
When his training ended, his firm took him on as a full-time employee. And from there, things only got better for Chris and his son.
His story became so well-known that it was eventually adapted into the film “The Pursuit of Happyness" which starred Will Smith.
Chris didn’t have the connections or advantages that make it easier for other people to get rich.
Yet, there was something inside him that helped Chris climb out of rock bottom and become one of the wealthiest men in the U.S.
Removing Negative Blocks To Wealth And Plant Empowering Beliefs Deep In The Subconscious - CLICK HERE [Link this to https://subliminaltracks.com/r/awmc/YourIDHere/YourTracking]
What’s Holding You Back?
Most people don't realize this, but certain areas in their brain can literally make them RICH.
And since they aren’t aware of this, they don’t know how to leverage it and use its FULL power.
This is why wealth flows effortlessly into some people’s lives…
…while others always seem to LOSE money no matter what they do!
Maybe you’re thinking:
“What do they know that I don’t?”
“Why are other people cruising on Easy Street and making tons of money… while I’m over here settling for peanuts?”
"Why do I keep losing money even though I'm not spending on anything else aside from the bills??"
Well, the truth is that wealthy people DON'T have an unfair advantage over you.
They’re NOT more talented, charming, or worthier than you.
No matter who they are, or where they come from, the world's richest people have one thing in common:
Their brains have the right mental pathways and thought patterns that instinctively drive them to identify opportunities for massive wealth – and TAKE ACTION.
In other words, their brains are literally WIRED for wealth.
Under the hood of their minds, you'll find a set of beliefs, habits, and mindsets that make it possible for them to do what they do.
That’s it.
It has nothing to do with looks, talent, or "knowing the right people."
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‘Poor Person’s Brain’ No More: How To Finally Break Free
So, if you feel stuck and frustrated about your situation, you need to STOP beating yourself up about it.
More importantly, you need to stop blaming yourself for where you are right now. Your brain is only doing what it’s been trained to do.
Like everyone else, your mind operates on automatic thought patterns that allow you to survive in the world.
Here’s the thing, though - sometimes, these patterns don’t serve your best interests.
And this can lead to decisions that put you on a path that you don't actually want.
BUT what if you had the same thoughts, habits, and mindsets of a wealthy person?
What kind of actions would you take?
And how would that change the direction of your LIFE?
Here's a shocking discovery: only 20% of the population have a mind that’s wired for wealth.
So there’s a LOT of people who think, act and behave in ways that will always make them POOR. No matter what they do, they’ll be stuck where they are.
And having a poor person's brain means they'll always:
Overlook opportunities for wealth
Feel threatened by new ideas
Avoid success at every turn
So the real trick is to shift away from a mindset that's always on the defensive against perceived threats…
…and instead, move to a healthier belief system that naturally ATTRACTS wealth no matter what.
Change is always scary, especially when it comes to your most deeply-held beliefs.
After all, this is the lens from which you perceive the world. And your belief system has helped you survive so far.
So, it can be uncomfortable to leave your mental comfort zone and adapt a better mindset.
And it’s this discomfort that keeps so many people trapped in the SAME OLD patterns, over and over.
But if you’re willing to embrace this initial discomfort and have the courage to try something NEW…
…then only good things can follow.
Change IS Possible
The truth is that you can cultivate a new way of thinking, which allows you to have traits, habits, and attitudes of wealthy people.
You can literally RE-WIRE your brain and create new thought patterns that will inevitably generate money in your life.
Shifting to this new mindset will help you:
Intuitively identify ways to make massive wealth (which are invisible to everyone else!)
Cultivate a curiosity about the world and open up NEW opportunities to make money
Develop the creativity to diversify your streams of income and have them run on auto-pilot
The problem is that poor people experience some sort of “mental resistance” when trying to shift to this mindset.
Their old patterns of thinking seem too powerful to overcome.
Thoughts based on fear and self-doubt add up to a negative state of mind.
And strangely enough, people hold on this because it offers a sense of security and predictability.
And so, they're happy to go back to their old ways and get the same results.
But there’s HOPE.
If you’ve felt the same resistance when trying to change for the better…
…you can now break through these mental barriers effortlessly.
And shifting to this frame of mind is easier than you think.
All you need to do is train your brain for minutes a day so you can gradually (but quickly) re-wire the automatic thought patterns within.
You see, most people (scientists included) previously thought that the human brain hardens like concrete at some point in a person’s life.
However, this couldn’t be more wrong.
The latest research tells us that the brain is quite flexible - even at OLD AGE.
Neuroscientists call this phenomenon "neuroplasticity," which is the process of growing new neural connections in the brain.
With the right PUSH, you can kickstart this growth process and access the areas of your mind that will help you think and act like the world’s richest people.
This is the KEY to making money on instinct.
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